So I have two anon messages and I realize some people are tired of the debacle but:

If you’re uninterested, feel free to scroll on. One message reads:

wow racist much? she cant appreciate mexican culture because shes white? holy shit…

and the other reads:

I think it’s very uneducated of you to assume that every non Mexican participating in Mexican festivities is doing so out of ignorance and disrespect. To make that statement truthful you would have to know each person in their entirety. That being said, your reverse racism is appalling. You should feel esteemed that other cultures are interested in your customs; which is not even a mere sign of disregard. It seems as though you have an entitlement issue and it needs to be overcome desperately.

I think we need to define some things for some people and maybe do a little basic 101. There’s a difference between Racism and Discrimination.

Racism = Prejudice + Power. In America, in the United States. White people experience the most privilege and power dealing with race. They have it. Others do not. This is why we say things like “White people can be racist, but POCs can only be prejudiced.” They do not have the power to systematically back their racism up - to institute it into laws, to have hundreds of years of benefits over the other races that make up this nation through years of legal favoritism. So I am not being racist. And by the very implication of my being “reverse” racist, you are saying that only white people can be racist anyways. For any white person to experience that is to have what they can inflict on others brought back to them. That’s a scary proposition if you’re white, and doing something racist, but that’s not what’s happening here.

I haven’t told anyone anything discriminatory. I’ve merely expressed upset that someone would knowingly after people told her it was hurtful and offensive misuse a part of my culture that is supposed to honor the dead.

If you are interested in my culture, I welcome you. But you don’t get to take it. You don’t get to use it as your plaything. It is not your toy. You are the one who is not entitled to anything here. If I am entitled, that is because it is mine. This is my family. These are our people. This is our culture. Our way of honoring the dead.

This isn’t like we did something neat that is just pretty. This isn’t just a cool dance, or a great fashion sense. This is about visiting the graves of our family and honoring them. This is a celebration of life and death and what that means. This is about honoring dead children, babies, Aunts or Uncles, Mothers, Fathers, Grandfathers or Grandmothers, Great grandmothers, GreatGrandfathers, cousins, friends, loved ones. A lot of this includes prayer. A lot of these celebrations - if not most - are religious in nature even if the people are not particularly religious themselves. There are altars. We tidy graves, and talk about people’s lives and what they meant and how we knew them. It varies from family to family.

There are festivities. And if you would like to watch, or participate, or are invited, I am not stopping you.

But this is not what is happening. You are telling me I should be grateful that you are interested at all. I don’t care if you’re interested. Your interest isn’t something I feel lucky to have bestowed upon me. Frankly, you’re not that special. This girl is not joining in on Dia de Los Muertos. She is using the calavera imagery to go out on Halloween. That is the problem — Dia de Los Muertos and Halloween are not the same thing. She is not celebrating DdLM. She is not participating. She is painting her face and celebrating a costume. She doesn’t care about the culture at all — she just wants to looks cool. If you cared about the culture, if you were interested at all, or paid any attention or participated in DdLM this would be a different story, but that’s not what’s happening here.

I don’t care if white people want to join the party. But when you come into my house? We go by my rules. That’s called manners. End of story.